Kids Tell the Truth.

Student Definition-

“Bore (as a verb)- what the principal does at assembly”

Tempered Expectations.

Sometimes, it can be perfectly clear where my students get their ideas:


“Hi, this is Mister K from School and I just wanted to let you know that your student currently has a 17% in my class. This is my third time trying to contact you, I left a few messages and a request for a conference but I never heard back from you. Anyway, you will see an “F” on his report card for this grading period because he has rarely done any work at all and has failed all of his tests.”

Parent: “Give him extra credit.”

“I don’t offer extra credit in place of missing assignments in my class. Either way, his current grade is far too low for an extra credit assignment to benefit him at this point.”

Parent: “You say he has a 17%, right? He knows that if he gets a 40 or higher, he gets to pick a video game from the store.”


Notice: Sigh.

“Mister, you’re mean, why did you call my mom?”

“I asked you to return that notice to me signed, and you didn’t, so I had to call to make sure your parents know what was going on with your grade”

“I know, but I told them I had an A in your class and they believed me, now they think I’m failing”

“You are failing.”

“I know, but now they know that.”

“That’s why I called, that’s why I sent the notice in the first place. Your parents need to know about your grades.”

“My mom works at a school, I’m going to get her to change my grade.”

“Is it this school?”


Out of the Mouths of Babes.

“For this ten question quiz, you will have ten minutes. Make sure to read each question carefully and take your time.”

Student: “Ten minutes? How are we supposed to finish each question in 30 seconds?”

Other student: “You have ten minutes.”

Student: “I know, and ten questions, so thirty seconds each.”

Other student: “My God, you’re dumb.” 

If only this were false…

During a true/false quiz, this happened:


Student: “Mister K, can one of the answers be true-false?”

Me: “All ten of the answers are true or false. Follow the directions.”

Student: “No, I know, I mean can one of them be true-false, like kinda true, kinda false?”

Me: “Either true or false is always going to be a better answer, read carefully.”

Student: “So this isn’t a true-false test then?”